Sunday, August 28, 2011

Glimmer of Hope

Friday morning, August 26 I made my second major contact with Jamaica this month. They are working on a potential match. It will be some time before we have additional details, but it appears our first child is waiting for us in Jamaica. So, I guess we can say we are expecting. I am hoping we have a definite match by Christmas and maybe even more details to celebrate. We are unsure of how long it will take for Jamaica to finalize the match and to get us information about our child, it could be weeks or months.

I do not feel comfortable yet saying I am a mom until the match is finalized and I can personalize the the child. I know I will love any child who is matched to us, but I do not want to attach, yet, to a child until we have a name. I hope, I pray that one day soon we will be able to say, "We are parents!"

There are many questions. Who is our child? What is the name of our child? What is the background history of our child? Why is our child available for adoption? How old is our child? What does our child like: food, color, clothes, animal, toy, story?

I have an inner peace that one of our adoption processes is still moving forward. At this point, I have a glimmer of hope.

Psalm 119:114
You are my refuge and my shield; I have put my hope in your word.

by Tom Fisher© July 19, 2005

I stepped into her room today
Knowing she's not there
This waiting for referral
Is more than one can bear
But taking in the moment

I sit down on the floor
And dream of her here with me
When waiting is no more.

A little giggle fills the air
As I rub her feet
I place my hand upon her heart
To feel its every beat.
A song is sung so very soft

Her eyes begin to close
She’s meeting me in dream land
A place where love still grows.

My vision now is very blurred
The tears stream down my cheeks
I’ve dreamed of her quite often
Throughout these past few weeks.

Suddenly a sound is heard
The phone rings in the hall
Waking up I quickly pray
Please let it be "The Call."

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Adoption Update and Sponsorship

Looks like our foster home study is approved, just have to have the background check done, again, since it has been more than 3 months. Then our license will be issued, hopefully next week! Once I get word the licensed is issued, I can call the adoption worker at DSHS to set up a meeting. I want to start working on the paperwork. We are making progress, allbeit, slowly.

I feel like I need to do some babysitting to get a child fix. I have been a bit child-shy the past several months, but I now feel it is time to spend time with one or two.

Thursday I call Jamaica again to see if we can get matched to a child.

Only God knows who my child is and where the child is currently located. I can just pray my child is being loved, protected and cared for by caretakers.

As I write this, I have the most current photo of the 10 year old girl I sponsor. She lives in Guatemala with her parents and sisters. I have been her sponsor since 2008 and have enjoyed watching her blossom with health care, new clothes and education. She smiles now and has a look of hope. I started sponsoring her before we decided to adopt and before my sister became pregnant, but I felt a need to be involved with a child's life. It helps to know this young girl has an opportunity for an education through the sponsorship of Children International. My latest letter to her explores career options she might consider. As she grows, it gives me a glimpse into the potential life of my own future child. She is the beauty in the photo.

Proverbs 2:9-11:

Then you will understand what is right and just and fair—every good path. For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul. Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Jamaican Contact

I started calling Jamaica on Wednesday to find out if there was a match possible for us. Wednesday I was given another number to call either Thursday or Friday. I called the new number on Thursday and was told my contact was out all day, try again Friday. I called again today (Friday) and was able to speak to my contact! I confirmed we are interested in a child age 2 to 8, no older than 8, we have no preference on gender and that my email address was in our Pre-Approval Application. She said she will look into our case then email me if there is a potential match. I figure I will still need to call weekly until we do get a match as the matching process can take months. Only God knows who our child is and when we will find out about him/her.

One of my co-workers had a dream we adopted a tiny Jamaican infant which I brought to work every day and we all took turns caring for it for an hour. Ha! Ha! Mike and I agree - no babies. There may be some truth, though, in that dream. Our child may be a small Jamaican baby now, but we may not be matched until the child is older. Our child may be a petite Jamaican child. We do not know. We will not know until we are matched either through Jamaica or through DSHS.

I am contemplating buying some school supplies this month now that they are on sale just because all elementary school-aged children need a backpack, paper, pencils, crayons, erasors, tissues, lunch box, pencil box, calculator and peechees/folders. These can be stored until needed next year or the year after or the year after and we can purchase some a little at a time. I will be attending the school's back-to-school BBQ the day before school begins to meet other parents and some of the teachers. I want to become a familiar face before we even have children.

I am working to touch bases with more adoptive mothers to get information, find support, laugh, cry and find commraderie. Parenthood is not easy, but adoption tends to through some extra twists into the crazy ride and it helps to have others who know how to survive those twists.

The coming twelve months is going to be full of surprises, frustrations, joys and sorrows; just as the past twelves months contained all these.